“You’ve been criticising yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” - Louise L. Hay

What thoughts come to mind when you read this wonderful quote by Louise Hay?

In a world that focuses heavily on achievement and perfection, I see an increasing number of people suffering from a very strong inner critical voice. They often feel that they don’t live up to their high standards regarding their appearance, achievements, social standing and they don't allow themselves to make mistakes.

Most of the clients I see are not familiar with the word fallible.
Fallible means "capable of making mistakes or being wrong". If you see yourself as fallible, it means you can let yourself off the hook for making a mistake (while mindfully considering ways to improve in the future).

Self-compassion is the practice of extending kindness, care and understanding towards oneself, especially during moments of suffering, failure or feeling inadequate.

It involves speaking to yourself the same way as you would speak to your closest friend, with empathy, understanding and warmth instead of intolerance, anger and judgment.

Self-Compassion helps you to climb out of the well from feeling depressed to feeling sad about a situation which didn’t work out well for you.

Did you know that the best treatment for depression is self-compassion? 

“This is a moment of suffering. Suffering is part of life. May I be kind to myself in this moment. May I give myself the compassion I need.” — Kristin Neff 💖

There are ways you can manage your negative self talk and nurture your inner self. Here's an idea for you:

Negative self-talk: – "This is embarrassing, everyone is so much better than me."
Alternative response: – "I’ve only just started working here. Everyone has to start somewhere".

Think about what you would say to your best friend or close family member if they shared this negative self talk. What would I say to ………………. ?

What is Compassion-Focused Therapy?

Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT) is an innovative form of psychotherapy developed by Dr. Paul Gilbert. It integrates principles from evolutionary psychology, Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT), and neuroscience to help individuals cultivate self-compassion and alleviate emotional distress.

Compassion-Focused Therapy offers a powerful approach to overcoming self-criticism and nurturing a healthier, more compassionate relationship with yourself.

CFT is based on the understanding that human brains have evolved to respond to threats, often leading to self-critical thoughts and feelings of shame.

Benefits of CFT:

        •       Reduced symptoms of anxiety and depression.
        •       Increased emotional resilience.
        •       Enhanced overall well-being and life satisfaction.
        •       Improved relationships through greater empathy and understanding.

I’d love to hear your thoughts about this, as its a hot topic. If you or a loved one are finding life difficult, please get in touch with me as I have trained in Compassion-Focused Therapy.

Let’s have a free, confidential chat to see if we can work together.  

Please feel free to contact me on 07967 753460 or using the contact form as I would love to hear from you.